Glued to the TV

Picture this: It’s the weekend, and your (insert age of your own child here) year-old is stretched out on the floor watching TV. You ask them to tidy their room. Ten minutes later, they haven’t moved. 

You ask again, giving the request a little more emphasis. No movement. Next time, you stand between them and the TV. Movement this time, but only enough to lean around you so they can still see the screen.

Are they ignoring you? Well, yes, and no. Even if the TV show is only half interesting, their attention is fully focused on it. Human brains do this really well. Children’s brains do it even better than adults. They won’t focus on anything else. Even your pleading room-tidying voice.

You’ve just fallen for the old, ‘tell me, I forget’ trick. It works so well that we use it over and over. Often without realising it. The ‘tell me’ trick doesn’t work for a small percentage of children. That is, they remember what they’ve been told. But it's forgotten for a greater number, nearly all of them, less than ten minutes after hearing what you’ve said. 

‘Go tidy your room.’ 

They not only need to remember what you’ve said, there’s an action attached. Countless teachers have been frustrated by ‘tell me, I forget.’ Remember ‘chalk and talk?’ At least the telling was accompanied by words or pictures on a blackboard. Universities present lectures in much the same way despite research indicating it is the least effective way of having someone retain information.

That’s all very well, but my kid is still glued to the TV and hasn’t tidied his room.